Sunday, October 16, 2011

When One Door Closes - My 9 Month Update

Congratulations me! If I had been pregnant I would be in the home stretch of giving birth and I might just have a little bundle of joy by now. Unfortunately that's not the case, instead of getting pregnant, I got culture shocked lol.

This last month has brought about a lot of different challenges and emotions. I was able to finally clear my head by taking a vacation and getting away from the house. That led to many rational discussions with my husband about our futures, both together as a couple and as individuals. As with any marriage there are adjustments to be made and sometimes I'm not sure if he wants me to care or not lol. He swears I'm stubborn but I assure you he is just as stubborn as I am. So we've agreed I should keep kicking his butt so he can stick to his diet and work on getting a better job. I think the realization that I'm never going to be an Indian wife and do everything for him is finally sticking to his brain.

*side note* Though I must admit, even though he sometimes acted like he wished I was an Indian wife doing every little thing like he was a God, he NEVER actually listened to me or took my advice when I tried. Like this diet thing...OMG. Having battled my weight in the past I had taken many diet/nutrition courses and learned so much about eating but he refuses to listen to anything I tell him. Currently he's obsessed with eating 3-4 bites of Special K in the morning. He doesn't seem to realize I'm right when I tell him that incites his starvation instincts and then he eats 2 dinners plus snacks at night. He's never going to lose anything that way. But, I've given up trying to tell him that now lol.

I think all in all we're doing pretty well on remaining equal and growing together as a couple. I've become more vocal on the things that I feel need changing around here as well. Nope, I'm not one of those women who come in and expect everyone to change completely for them. What I'm referring to is the cleaning of the house and the hygiene standards of the family members. There are some huge differences between the information that has been embedded into my mind and the way they clean house. I don't expect these changes to come about any time soon because no one in this country cares about such things but I feel better knowing they understand my position. Until they see what I mean, I guess I will still be the only one bleaching the shower stall but I'm okay with that because I need that space to be clean lol. (And for my skeptics...no one knows I clean it but hubby because I'm not about to have this added to my schedule as some kind of daily chore.)

Hubby started telling me the other day how I will soon be the woman of the house. To which I replied 'good, because we need to get some of that washable paint so I don't have to see dirty fingerprints on the wall where no one here washes their hands.' I know that was snotty but it had to be said. Cheap paints that you can't wash just don't work in a house where hand washing isn't practiced frequently.

This may all seem rough on my part but I see it as more of my true integration into the house. As part of the house, my opinion and thoughts matter and I'm not asking for them to buy me expensive things. I'm asking them to make the home a safe haven for everyone that lives here. I'm asking them to take pride in the one place that should be their own little slice of heaven - away from the world and all that is wrong with it. I will not be taking over anything in this household anytime soon though because I don't have the time or the energy nor the desire.

Though this past month brought about a lot of uncertainty professionally for me, I have been mostly back to my old self and thinking clearly. I won't say the culture shock is over because I still feel like I'm experiencing some things that are not ordinary. I have still had some homesickness and I've had a cold/flu/sore throat for most of the month. Hubby shared his germs with me....isn't he sweet....yeah, not really lol. I haven't lost my marbles and went off on anyone though so it is nice to be free from the anger.

Now I'm off to finish working on and planning for the holidays.

2 comments:

  1. Absolutely! I'm working on some new articles for that blog now. I won't be posting as often there since forensics doesn't move as fast as my personal life, but I will definitely be using that to grow my own knowledge as well as showcase my skills as a writer.

    And you're right, that comment was definitely a one sided and emotional comment. There is never a label that fits everyone or every group. Even I fall victim to the emotions I feel fairly often. I can honestly say though that no one in this house seems to care (except FIL who doesn't really understand). I'm still amazed that my husband didn't realize that we have had gnats in the shower stall for 8 months. He thinks they just came in season now....umm...hello? A little clueless are we hahahaha. I think this is just how they get used to living and don't even notice anymore. While I don't think the gnats will go away, I refuse to shower in a moldy shower that never gets cleaned. I just arm myself with bleach and scrub it myself which makes me feel better and we're all happy because they don't even know I did it (I'm still not allowed to clean...I need to blog on that, it's kinda funny).

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  2. *no one in this country cares about such things *  I may not totally agree with this, however yes as per our experiences we tend to conclude :) 

    I am going through an uncertain phase as well..sigh...there is always such phases in life. never mind :) i would like to read more on your other blog....that interests me a lot, i am not sure if i grabbed the feed, i may have, but when you update, can you please share the linki?

    #_# The Blunt Blog

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